Having a personal trainer can really help you achieve your health and fitness goals. A great trainer teaches you proper form, holds you accountable and gives you that extra push you need to get results. Yet, not all trainers are alike, and if yours offers you any of the following “gems of wisdom” it may be time to serve him his walking papers.
1) “All of my clients get results from this program and so will you!” Because no two human bodies are alike, there’s no way of guessing exactly how one person’s body is going to respond to a workout and nutrition program. To achieve optimal results, an effective fitness regime must be tailor-made to each individual client’s needs. You have no time for cookie cutter routines or someone who treats you like every other client. Your trainer should request your doctor’s clearance before beginning a program. He should take measurements regularly to chart your progress. A diligent trainer will listen to you on an ongoing basis and keep you safe as you achieve solid results gradually over time.
2) “Spot training is the way to train those problem areas.” You can’t dictate how your body loses fat or builds muscle. Everyone has certain problem areas- those pesky love handles, too much junk in the trunk- that need to be addressed with training. Likewise, every guy wants bigger arms, smaller waist, stronger legs, etc. Strength training combined with effective cardio training and a solid nutrition program is the surest way to reduce fat not just in one area, but across your entire body. A variety of weight training exercises that target muscles individually and in combination with other muscle groups is the best way to maintain and build muscle in all areas.
3) “The Bosu ball is the best way to train core.” At some point Bosu balls became all the rage. Doing everything on the ball from dumbbell curls to barbell squats was considered the best way to improve core strength. Unfortunately, this practice can be dangerous and seriously harm lots of people, especially neophytes, by throwing off their balance and coordination. The Bosu ball is one tool. Try doing core exercises using an exercise ball and some lighter weights for better and safer results.
4) “Cut out all carbohydrates and grab more protein!” Protein is essential after workouts since it’s the nutrient your muscles need most for recovery and growth. But the body also requires carbohydrates to assimilate protein. Carbs fuel your body for all activities from the moment you get out of bet until the time you finish the dishes at night! Try lower glycemic index carbs (whole grains, fresh fruits and vegetables) early in the day for a steady supply of energy all day long. High glycemic index carbs like bananas, citrus, or a fruit smoothie after your workout will replenish glycogen stores and restore lost nutrients and energy expended during workouts.
We may be well into the summer, but the anti-gay panic that comes to a boil in June as a result of gays having done stole the whole month to celebrate our heathen desires is still simmering.
Case in point: Star Parker’s recent column titled, “Do Christians Have a Future in LGBTQ America?”
“Gay Pride Month has become a time for LGBTQ storm troopers to pursue political enemies,” Parker writes. “Not much different from the infamous Kristallnacht in Nazi Germany, when Nazi brown shirts took to the streets to smash windows of shops owned by Jews.”
Not much different, huh? I’m thinking back to the Pride event I attended last month. I didn’t see any window smashing or violent oppression by LGBTQ people against Jews or anybody else. I did see lots of same-sex couples holding hands, people of indeterminate gender going about their business of being human, a drag queen with makeup melting in the heat, and a lot of cute dogs in rainbow bandanas. I personally spent a lot of my time looking for one of those “Hate Has No Home Here” yard signs, which I finally located at a local PFLAG chapter’s booth.
But to Parker we were all engaged in an act of oppression against her because she, as a Christian, doesn’t want to acknowledge us as humans and thus finds our mere existence in public, celebrating no less, to basically be an anti-Christian hate crime.
Never mind the fact that LGBTQ Christians exist. Since Parker would like nothing less than the elimination of LGBTQ people (through so-called “conversion therapy” or at least the disappearance from public life), this is a difference on which there can be no compromise. There is no middle ground to give when what’s in question is my very right to be treated as a human being deserving of equality.
It’s also interesting to note Parker’s comparison of LGBTQ people to Nazis at a time when we have a president who claims that white supremacists are “very fine people” and a racist attorney general. The Trump administration has been the most openly hostile to LGBTQ people in forever. So Parker can miss me with the Nazi comparisons.
Something Parker is really struggling with is the LGBTQ acronym itself, specifically the “B.” As most people know, the “B” stands for “bisexual.” But, according to Parker, it really stands for “bestiality.”
“They keep pushing out this idea, LGBTQ,” she says in a radio interview with right-wing host Jerry Newcombe. “We did the ‘L’ and the ‘G,’ they legalized marriage for themselves. We’re doing the ‘T’ now, the trans, and this is a big, big challenge in our society right now. They did the ‘Q’ where they’re changing all the textbooks, even as low as kindergarten, to reflect that you don’t know what you are, you’re questioning. But notice they skipped over the ‘B,’ and there are some that say this ‘B’ is going to bombard us with real vileness in our society if they get what they want because it’s not about bisexuality, it’s about bestiality.”
Newcombe asks her to explain. “We do know that there is an agenda and we do know that there have been discussions about bestiality in their closed doors,” she says. “I’m just saying don’t be surprised if we find out that that ‘B’ is not what they said publicly—that we just love each other—that it may, in law, show up as something else.”
Apparently Parker thinks that LGBTQ is a “To Do” list, not an acronym. And she has a pretty warped view of strides toward equality (i.e. “They legalized marriage for themselves”). It is very interesting that she claims we “skipped over the ‘B,” since that is a legit complaint by many bisexual people who feel invisible.
But that’s not what she’s addressing, of course. She is equating LGBTQ people with the most depraved acts she can think of. To her we aren’t humans, we’re dog fuckers.
Remember, that’s the only way the right’s “religious freedom” bullshit can be justified. If LGBTQ people are just so degraded and vile that no decent person would want to be associated with them. That even Jesus Himself would be like, “Eww. No.”
So when Parker complains that the rainbow flag makes her feel unwelcome, let’s be clear that LGBTQ people do not owe people who won’t acknowledge our humanity any open arms.
Beginning August 24 during a special preview week, and continuing through September 30, select Orlando restaurants will offer three course, prix fixe dinners for just $35. So call friends, family or co-workers and start making plans now.
Through Visit Orlando (website below), one dollar from every meal served during Magical Dining Month benefits local nonprofits that help children in need. And, thanks to continued growth of the program, they are able to help two organizations again this year.
In 2018, Magical Dining Month will benefit Best Buddies and the Down Syndrome Association of Central Florida; two organizations that work tirelessly to help children and families living with disabilities in Central Florida.
Best Buddies Central Florida – is the world’s largest organization dedicated to ending the social, physical and economic isolation of people with Down syndrome, autism, cerebral palsy, traumatic brain injuries and other disabilities. With programs focusing on friendship, jobs, and leadership, Best Buddies helps people with intellectual and developmental disabilities create lasting relationships, find employment, live independently and develop communication skills.
In Florida alone, Best Buddies has more than 11,000 e-Buddies and volunteers in public schools, colleges and communities, allowing Best Buddies to impact more than 100,000 people with and without disabilities in Florida.
The BestBuddies Friendship Program, which exists in various schools and communities, creates social opportunities to build one-to-one friendships between peers with and without disabilities.
Down Syndrome Association of Central Florida – was founded in 1991, and has touched the lives of more than 12,000 individuals with Down syndrome and their families by offering hope, acceptance, and empowerment through advocacy, education and awareness.
With the help from more than 17,000 friends, professionals, volunteers and other supporters, DSACF creates a Central Florida community dedicated to guiding individuals with Down syndrome through life so that each may realize their potential.
Along with emotional and financial support to those with Down syndrome and their families, DSACF offers various resources and programs to every age and stage, from baby playgroups and parent workshops for new and expecting parents to helping adolescents plan for their future as they transition into adulthood.
Visit the Down Syndrome Association of Central Florida website at https://www.dsacf.org/
The Amway Arena presents Cirque Du Soleil – Crystal from today until August 5. This new show explores the artistic limits of ice for the first time in the company’s 34-year history. This unique production pushes boundaries of performance by combining stunning skating and acrobatic feats that defy the imagination. Tickets start at $45.
Amalia Arena presents Panic! At The Disco at 7pm. The tour is in honor of their sixth studio album, Pray For The Wicked. Pray For The Wicked follows Panic! At The Disco’s critically acclaimed fifth album, Death Of A Bachelor, which was released on January 15, 2016 via Fueled By Ramen/DCD2 Records. The album debuted at No. 1 on the Billboard 200 Chart and was nominated for Best Rock Album at the 2017 GRAMMY Awards. Ticket prices start at $26.00, and go to $66.
Thursday, August 2
Starting today and going through Sunday, the Flamingo Resort presents the 5thannual Florida Puppy Contest: The Year of the Dog. The weekend will also feature classes, mosh, leather themed drag shows and male entertainers.
Friday, August 3
Southern Nights Tampa presents NeiBEARhood Takeover: Mancakes. Tis will feature an all you can eat buffer of men and fetish gear is strongly encouraged. There will be a performance and games hosted by Bearonce. This is a 21 and over event and there is no cover before 10pm.
Saturday, August 4
The MBA presents their annual Pride Gala Business Awards from 6-10pm at the Hard Rock Live Orlando. The 2018 Pride in Business Awards Gala presented by PNC Bank will honor our region’s stellar performers in business within our LGBT community. With the awards presented by distinguished community leaders and business professionals during an incredible full course dinner, the Gala also includes an awesome silent auction, a special VIP pre-dinner reception, and an epic after party in City Walk! VIP Reception begins at 6:00pm (open bar and light bites), Cash bar, auction and general reception begins at 6:30pm with the Gala dinner and awards beginning at 7:30pm. Tickets are $150, with VIP $250 at MBAOrlando.org.
Balance Tampa Bay presentsAvant Garde, their 4th Annual Masquerade, complete with open bar, unparalleled ambiance and entertainment by world class DJ Toy Armada! The best part is the proceeds benefitEpic / Empath Health. They want your creativity to be at the center of this event, so wear anything you want, but they hope you’ll have on a mask. They are increasing the scale of Masquerade this year by hosting the event in the spectacular Armature Works, which features elegant décor, an amazing view and an unrivaled visual experience. To purchase tickets or for more info, go to:tampamasquerade.com/.
Kevin Hart’s Irresponsible Tour comes to the Amalia Arena at 7pm. Hart’s last multi-city domestic and international WHAT NOW comedy tour sold out large venues all over the world, including being the first comedian to sell out an NFL stadium, selling over 50,000 tickets in one show at Lincoln Financial Field. Internationally, he sold out over a dozen arenas in the European market, selling over 150,000 tickets, and sold out arenas across Australia, selling 100,000 tickets. Hart’s hit comedy tour grossed over $100 million worldwide. Ticket prices range from $35 to $125.
The Parliament House presents “Orlando’s 80’s Ball” with guest judge Dominique Jackson (Elektra from Pose).
Wednesday, August 8
Tampa Bay Diversity Chamber of Commerce August Social will be held at Punky’s (3063 Central Avenue North, St. Petersburg) from 6:30 to 8pm. As always they have complimentary appetizers and a cash bar. There will also be BINGO at 7:30, benefiting the Diversity Chamber’s Foundation. For more info go to:diversitytampabay.org.
Friday August 10
Black Haüs is invading Stonewall Bar Orlando with another fully immersive event, and this time they want you to join the CULT at 10pm. Imagine a dystopian future where the club scene has moved back underground and a resistance is gathering. Stonewall will be transformed into a rebel speakeasy quarantined off to only those who join the CULT; an abandoned underground filled with industrial music and art. They encourage leather and fetish gear, or come in your best cult attire…They will be waiting!
Southern Nights Orlando presents Carmella Marcella Garcia, as the Grand Ol’ gai from the south returns for one night. Show times are at 11pm & 12:30am withRoxxxy Andrews,Tasha Long,Maya Andrews,Sassy Devine& CARMELLA GARCIA! NO COVER before 11pm 21+ (18+ Welcome).
Saturday, August 11
The Ms. World America takes place at the Dr. Phillips Center and the pageant seeks to provide a unique opportunity for all contestants to network, develop, and share their skills and talents while creating impact in their own businesses and communities. The pageant starts at 7pm and tickets start at $30.
The Straz center for the Performing Arts presents the annual Pole for a Purpose pole dance and aerial arts showcase features performers from around the United States in this spectacular demonstration of alluring athleticism. Prepare for an evening of sultry thrills and intoxicating acrobatics on fourteen feet of chrome. The best part? All the fun is for a great cause – Pole for a Purpose has raised over $28,000 for charitable organizations. Tickets start at $42.50, and for more information, visitpoleforapurpose.com.
Tuesday, August 14
Amway Arena presents Shakira’s El Dorado World Tour (this is the Orlando tour stop originally scheduled for January 9, and all original tickets will be honored). The concert begins at 7:30pm with tickets starting at $47.50.
Don’t forget that every Tuesday, is FREE Pool night at Barcodes Orlando where there is never a cover!
Wednesday, August 15
From today through September 9, the Straz Center for the Performing Arts presents Hedwig and the Angry Inch. The gold glitter standard of queerglam rocker musicals, follows German immigrant-turned-transgender-Kansas-trailer-park-wannabe-rock-goddess Hedwig Robinson during one life-changing night of her musical act. Full of TMI, towering go-go boots and cult hits “Exquisite Corpse,” “Wig in a Box,” “Tear Me Down” and more, this campy romp reveals the blistering realities of self-acceptance that defy gender identity. Tickets start at $18, and for more info visitjobsitetheater.org/the-2018-19-anniversary-season.
Thursday, August 16
Starting today and going through Saturday, Southern Nights Orlando presents their 4 year anniversary. Tonight will feature, direct from Ru Paul’s Drag Race Season 10, finalist Eureka O’hara.
Friday, August 17
Actor, writer and producer David Koechner will be appearing at the Orlando Improv from today until August 19. He stars as Tush on CBS’s “Superior Donuts.” He’s also well-known for his roles as Todd Packer on “The Office” and Champ Kind from “Anchorman” and “Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues.” On the small screen, he appears in Showtime’s “Twin Peaks,” Comedy Central’s “Another Period,” ABC’s “The Goldbergs” and voices reoccurring characters on FOX’s “American Dad” and Netflix’s “F is for Family” and “All Hail King Julien.” When not filming, Koechner performs live stand-up comedy across the country and creates original content videos for his YouTube channel, “Full On Koechner.” Tickets start at $20.
The Flamingo Resort presents teir annual Turnabout at 11:30pm at the main bar. The night will feature your favorite bartenders and staff members dressed up with all proceeds benefiting Metro Wellness.
Saturday, August 18
Hamburger Mary’s Brandon presents “Paint Nite” from 1-3pm. Paint Nite features everything you need to create a one-of-a-kind painting. They will guide you and your friends through two lively hours of creativity, drinking, and laughing ‘til your cheeks hurt. The best part? You don’t have to be an artist to have an amazing time. Hamburger Mary’s is an open-air bar & grille for open-minded people, serving a full menu of tasty items… Big and juicy gourmet burgers, yummy apps, soups, salads and entrees, and an extensive bar menu featuring craft beers and cocktails. Food and drinks are not included, but are available for purchase from the venue. No outside food or drinks allowed. This Paint Nite Event is 21+.
Neema’s Upscale Latin night, Amor, at Stonewall Bar Orlando presents “Melina LeonN” live in Concert at 12 midnight. The show will also feature Rochelle Mon Chéri, Rakell Riviera, Yeisa Jovovich, and Saphyre L’Sweet Cardoza. Doors open at 9pm and there is $10 cover till 11pm, and $15 thereafter.
The Parliament House presents “Vegas Night: Celebrity Edition!” where they invite everyone to try their luck at Poker, Blackjack, Roulette with some tables with celebrity dealers. The Footlight Players will feature a “La Cage” celebrity Revue at 10pm and 12am. Proceeds to benefit Bliss Cares!
Amalia Arena presents two of the world’s greatest rock bands – Journey and Def Leppard. They are teaming up for a massive co-headliner with an arsenal of their hits such as “Pour Some Sugar on Me,” “Lights,” “Photograph,” “Don’t Stop Believin’,” “Rock of Ages” and “Faithfully.” The concert takes place at 7pm, with tickets ranging from $45.75 to $175.75.
Monday, August 20
Jill Sinclair presents the annual Miss Daytona Beach F.I Pageant, an official preliminary to Miss Florida F.I. pageant. Miss Daytona Beach will be held at Hamburger Marys Daytona Beach at 8pm and star the current reigning Miss Florida F.I. Kalah Mendoza, the current reigning Miss Daytona Beach, Susan Whitney, as well as Natalie Nayles (Miss Heart of Florida Newcomer), Rachel Summers, Brittany Moore (Miss Florida F.I. 2014 and the current reigning Miss Duval), and China Bell. For more information call Jill at 386-307-7944.
Thursday, August 23
The Orlando Improv presents Josh Wolf from today until August 25. When he’s not filming his top rated web series College Experiment forfoxsports.com, Josh Wolf’s unique, honest, and high energy style of storytelling has made him a favorite at comedy clubs across the country. Josh wrote for many shows like Yes Dear, Will Smith’s All of Us, and Cuts starring Shannon Elizabeth. Years ago, he was cast on Last Comic Standing and was on the season finale as one of the Last Comics Downloaded. Since that time, he has had a recurring role on My Name is Earl, Raising Hope, played the role of Jack in the musical version of Sideways, and done several hosting type jobs for E! Josh currently is writing a feature film for Adam Sandler’s company. You can also see Josh on the road most weekends either opening for Chelsea Handler or Larry the Cable Guy, with the Comedians of Chelsea Lately. Tickets start at $20.
Friday, August 24
Magic Mike Tour comes to Hamburger Mary’s Brandon, with doors opening at 9pm and the show at 10pm to 12:30am. Magic Mike Tour All Star Male Revue. We are the hottest male revue in the nation. To date, 3 million women have witnessed our first class stages hunks, live and in the flesh! Appearances include VH1, Fox News, GQ, International Male magazine, and countless others. The ultimate Vegas experience is coming to perform for one night only, so plan to be part of the biggest ladies night ever and come out to see the 2018 Magic Mike Tour! Guaranteed to entice and intrigue women of all ages!! This hard body team is ready to bring you the most electrifying show that you don’t want to miss! Grab your girlfriends and plan to have a girls night out like no other! Ladies, buy your tickets early to beat the crowd at the door! Tis is a 21 and over event, with tickets ranging from $25-$50 atticketfly.com/purchase/event/1726251.
The Tampa Improv presents Leslie Jones of SaturdayNight Live fame from today until August 26. Her work on the long standing sketch show has garnered her an Emmy Award nomination and inclusion on the Time 100 list. Leslie has covered the most recent summer and winter Olympics for NBC and was the host ofThe 2017 BET Awards. She is currently recording one of the lead roles inAngry Birds 2, for Sony Pictures. Jones also starred in Paul Feig’s reboot ofGhostbusters, alongside Melissa McCarthy, Kristen Wiig and Kate McKinnon. Her other film credits include Chris Rock’sTop Five, Judd Apatow’sTrainwreck, and the animated filmSing. Tickets tart at $50.
Saturday, August 25
Barcodes Orlando presents their monthly Leather night (last Saturday of every month) with sexy leather men, free parking and never a cover!
Star Wars in Concert continues with Star Wars: Return of the Jedi in Concert at the Dr. Phillips Center for the Performing Arts. Featuring the iconic full-length film on the big screen with The Orlando Philharmonic Orchestra performing John Williams’s legendary score live. In the spectacular climactic sixth episode of the Star Wars saga, Darth Vader readies the second Death Star to unleash the final blow to the Rebel Alliance. Luke Skywalker joins his droid allies R2-D2 and C-3PO, along with Princess Leia, to free his comrade Han Solo, imprisoned by the vile crime lord, Jabba the Hutt. Reunited, the Rebels race to the moon of the planet Endor where they launch a desperate attack upon the entire Imperial Fleet. But the ultimate battle is between father and son, as Luke faces Darth Vader one last time, for the fate of the galaxy hangs in the balance. This event takes place at 7:30pm with tickets $49.50.
The Parliament House features RuPaul’s Drag Races Season 4 star Willam with the Footlight Players at 10pm and 12am.
Monday, August 27
Hardrock Orlando presents the 23rd annual k92.3 all-star jam presented by jasper contracting. Taking place from 8-11pm, the event features music by: Chris Young, Lauren Alaina (American Idol), Chris Janson, Kip Moore, Jimmie Allen, Jordan Davis, Dylan Scott, Lanco, Danielle Bradbury and Morgan Wallen. Tickets are $90 Reserved Balcony, and $300 VIP Meet & Greet Balcony.
Just before releasing a hotly anticipated new album with Sugarland bandmate Kristian Bush, duo frontwoman Jennifer Nettles summed up her history of progressive politics and queer advocacy and love for chicken with one defiant tweet: “Steals recipe for world’s best chicken sandwich and opens ‘Chic-fi-Gay.’ Serves EVERYBODY deliciousness and is open on Sundays. Wins world,” she wrote on May 15, her unfettered outspokenness still a rare but significant thing in country music.
“Or the spinoff of it: It can start as Chick-fil-Gay and then it could just turn into Chick-fil-Heyyy!, which would be super fun too,” she tells me with a robust guffaw.
Bigger, the band’s first release since their long-established country sound was cranked to arena-rock heights on 2010’s The Incredible Machine, reflects on our emotionally and politically strained modern world (their powerful lament, “Tuesday’s Broken,” addresses America’s gun problem and school shootings) with love, hope, unity and inclusiveness, themes near and dear to Sugarland since the release of their 2002 debut. “These are the days of the underdog, the counted out, the ones you don’t see coming; times of the left-behinds…,” Nettles sings on “Not the Only,” counting herself among us. “Silent voices I’ve never heard, all waiting to say the words, held up and kept inside, but we don’t have to hide.”
Here, Nettles wins the world by phoning to talk about Sugarland’s mission to shine a light on the unseen, being political post-Dixie Chicks, and why it’s important for people (see: homophobes) to not get it twisted: that “Mother” lyric is most definitely referring to a gay couple in love.
Did recent world tragedies and the country’s overall divisiveness have anything to do with you getting back to your Sugarland roots?
Yeah. I had been feeling the urges to get back and do something and see what that would feel like again. At first it seemed to be a matter of the calendar, and then we started writing and then when we looked at this collection and what was coming out of us we realized, “Whoa, we have a lot to say, and this is actually the reason for the timing” – that these messages that we have are, well, no pun intended, bigger than what, initially, this reconvening was going to be. It was very much a bigger message for the world.
I hear myself and my community’s struggles represented in some of these songs, and I feel emboldened by them. To what extent was the queer community on your mind while creating this album?
It was on our minds significantly. You hear those messages poke through within the music: messages of unity and inclusion, and of not only tolerance – sometimes tolerance to me is such a… ack!… it’s not even the right word anymore. We need to move beyond just tolerance. And it even needs to move beyond acceptance. It needs to move into celebration and just outright humanism.
I don’t think any person wants to just be tolerated.
Tolerated, no – I don’t even know where that word came from. It’s clear that whoever started throwing that term around was already coming from a defensive standpoint. So that being said, I think you hear those messages celebrated in songs like “Tuesday’s Broken,” “Mother” and “Not the Only,” and even in songs like “Bigger.” But you hear it much more clearly and outright on “Mother,” where it says, “She’s got a ring to give to you she hopes you’ll give away. She don’t care who you give it to, where they’re from, if they pray like you…”
And “first thing she taught you is love is love.”
Yeah, that love is love, right? So you hear it very distinctly and you hear it in the messages of heartaches in “Tuesday’s Broken.” Even in the second verse you don’t know why the teenage girl is on the bed and why she is possibly considering self-harming because of not feeling love and not feeling celebrated and not feeling a part of her community and being online, dear God help us all. So you hear those messages, for sure, throughout.
And for me, obviously always being a champion of the marginalized, always being a champion of those who are being oppressed – and all of these really horribly divisive tones that we hear now in our culture and in our community that have always been there but we’re hearing them now in a way that is super ugly – when you hear those messages of self-love and of inclusion on this record, absolutely the LGBTQA community was on our minds when we were writing this.
In the lyric video for “Mother,” two gay men are seen holding hands. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a gay couple featured in a major, mainstream country music video. Is that precisely why you chose to include them?
Yes! I mean, not to say like, “Hey! We’re the first ones in country music to feature a gay couple visually!” But to be able to say, “Just so you know, what you hear in this and what you might be assuming is absolutely visually and literally true. Like, if you might be toiling around with the idea of what this might be about, let’s go ahead and show you.”
It feels bold, but in 2018, I feel like it shouldn’t feel that way.
No, you’re right, it should not feel bold. But the interesting thing is the reason many times it feels bold within the country music community is because everyone talks about the Dixie Chicks syndrome of what we saw all those years ago. I think times are different. I think it is time for people within all of the music community, but especially in the country music community, where we have such a beautifully diverse audience – we are not preaching to the choir here. We are offering messages. We are offering them to hopefully inspire people to be open and think differently for those who may not already.
Did you learn that love is love from your mom?
Absolutely. I have a mother who’s beautifully open and unconditionally loving, not only to myself but to the world and, yeah, she definitely taught me very, very early on.
How have you passed that same sentiment onto your own son?
Magnus is 5, so certain concepts feel abstract in terms of “let me teach you a lesson.” What I do is show him through life. The gay community is a big part of our lives in terms of people. My manager is gay and my personal assistant is gay, and these are people who are family to me. My PA was my roommate all four years of college. You know what I’m saying? It’s a family.
So, it’s in life, it’s just a matter of fact. And if questions arise, as children many times will have, I will be very open and celebratory in that way. But children live what you show them, and if you show them love and if you show them openness, that is what they will enjoy. If you keep them closed off, and you show them hate, that is what they will reflect. So, he reflects my values in that way.
When confronted with backlash from conservative country fans, how do you stay motivated to keep letting your voice be heard in a genre that once sought to quiet artists like, for instance, the Dixie Chicks?
I believe that times are different and social media is an echo chamber. People shout their hate and other people shout hate back. So, I try to be mindful. Don’t get me wrong, I would love to keep people in check. But really, at the end of the day, that’s just noise. The importance is the message that I am putting out there. And if somebody fires back and they don’t like it on social media, who cares. And if people are going to judge someone’s art and someone’s music based on this really new concept of an artist being more personally connected, because now we do have immediate access through social media between fans and artist, then you know, don’t listen to the music, don’t buy it. To each his own. (Laughs)
There used to be a direct connection between the two that you couldn’t say too much because people wouldn’t buy your music and record labels would worry, but that doesn’t seem to be the case anymore.
No, I don’t think it can be because, especially now – again in the age of social media where you have a direct outlet to the world, not just to your fan base but to the world – I don’t think that dynamic exists anymore. The publicists and labels can’t worry about that in the same way because it’s like, look, you’re going to be who you are.
Especially once you’ve opened the floodgates. And you’ve opened the floodgates.
Yes, yes. (Laughs)
But some artists choose not to use their platform for political reasons. For instance, your collaborator on “Babe,” Taylor Swift, isn’t known for making political statements and she gets a lot of flak for that.
Really?
Yeah, she isn’t as politically outspoken as you, for example. Do you think artists have a responsibility to use their platform to speak out on matters of concern?
I think human beings have a responsibility. I definitely feel a calling within myself to speak my truth. I’m very outspoken in my own personal life as well so it bears to reason that I would be that authentic in my public life. Some people aren’t very outspoken, even in their private lives.
Have you prepared for the country conservatives who may have an issue with you broaching gun policy on “Tuesday’s Broken”?
Yes, but I feel really confident, Chris, in the sense that, look, what happens is everyone on the far margins scream and are terribly afraid that suddenly each of their rights are going to be completely obliterated by comprising at all. If you give anyone an inch, they’re gonna take a mile and pull you to the opposite pole – I don’t believe that. I believe that sensible gun control is possible. I believe we are in a challenging time right now with lobbyists and the NRA and different money powers, and I believe the waters are convoluted. I believe there needs to be tort reform within our congress and within the ways we vote on all of these issues.
Those are huge, broad issues, but at the end of the day, I believe it’s absolutely possible for us to do anything we want to. We can change the rules, we can remake the rules. We wrote ’em the first time. It’s possible to fix this. It’s possible to look at gun laws, it’s possible to look at mental health, and it’s possible to look at all of these pieces. We just have to be willing to do it and to elect the people who are going to do it.
Have you thought about how this album could bridge gaps between people who think like you and your conservative fanbase?
Look, art has many purposes. Sometimes it’s to entertain, sometimes it’s to inspire and sometimes it is even to provoke, and all of those are valid. What I hope we are able to do in Sugarland and in all of my music is to be able to inspire dialogue and to invite conversation. Rather than pressing the buttons, I want to sit in a corner, point a subversive finger and say, “What do you think about this over here? How could we make it better?”
To ask you a lighter question that’s tour related: Do you have a favorite Christian Siriano dress that you can’t wait to wear?
(Excitedly) Mmmm! There are several pieces I cannot wait to wear! I mean, he really did his thing on this, and we had such fun in this collaboration just because it already had a theme to it. So, he was able to then just take that and really have fun with it because the theme for the tour, visually and aesthetically, is this beautifully, other-world vintage circus-y look, so we had a lot of fun doing research for that.
How will the healing vibes of the album translate to the stage?
We try to make it feel transportive so when you leave you feel like you have been offered an escape and some asylum and some refugee, and that you leave feeling seen.
Sugarland is known for sneaking cover songs into the shows. Have you considered any cover songs that may fit the healing vibes of the album?
The fun part about the live shows is that over the course of the tour they will continue to evolve. We’ve got some cover choices and a remix situation that’s super, super funky and fun, and we also have a sort of an all-skate that we like to do at the end with all of our openers to come on and join us, and that’s usually a big, fun party.
I am sure that within that we will be able to figure out messages of unity; the potential is ripe for all of those messages. (Laughs) Right now, we’re leaning toward the fun party side, but that’s not to say that isn’t about unity too.
What do you hope your queer fans take away from this album?
I would harken back to our conversation regarding the tour: to feel seen. I think it’s such an interesting time where we are supposedly more technologically, in terms of ideas, connected than ever. But at the same time – the last song on the album, “Not the Only,” especially speaks to this – a lot of us still feel very alone and very unseen, and I hope that within the queer community, within the gay community, the trans community – the LGBTQA! All the letters! I hope that everyone feels seen, and let’s say again: celebrated.
It’s a comedy tradition, the man in a dress. Milton Berle, Tyler Perry, Tom Hanks, Martin Lawrence, Jack Lemmon, Tony Curtis and Eddie Murphy have all done it to great success. Adam Sandler has, too, but we’re trying to forget about that. Now it’s Sean Hayes’ turn in an indie comedy called Lazy Susan. Co-written by Hayes, Darlene Hunt (The Big C), and Carrie Aizley (Transparent), it’s about a woman named Susan – that’s Hayes – with a lot of problems, including a lack of motivation to solve those problems. It co-stars Aizley, Margo Martindale, Jim Rash, Matthew Broderick and Allison Janney. These are, to a person, comedy names we trust, but still we have no idea if the final product will work in the tradition of Some Like It Hot or crash and burn like Jack and Jill (that’s the Sandler one, and it hurts to even type out the title). For now we trust and hope and wait and watch some reruns of Trixie & Katya to keep our enthusiasm stoked.
Tessa Thompson Spins Off
Tessa Thompson is tearing up movie screens this summer in Sorry to Bother You as the woman with the world’s most anarchic earrings. And if you think you’ve seen her before, it’s because she’s spent 13 years working regularly in film and TV: on Westworld, in Dear White People, Thor: Ragnarok, and, most recently, that Janelle Monae video that spawned all the rumors of their now-confirmed-now-denied romantic relationship (both women recently came out but are still keeping their private details private, so we’re happy to give them their space). Now all those years of dues-paying has yet another franchise opportunity, this time outside the Marvel Cinematic Universe; Thompson will play a lead role in next year’s Men In Black spin-off film (as yet untitled). Director F. Gary Gray (Straight Outta Compton) has taken on helming duties, and Thompson’s co-stars include Chris Hemsworth, Rafe Spall, Liam Neeson and Kumail Nanjiani. No story details yet – they’re rightly keeping everything under wraps — but you’ll know everything you need to know come summer of 2019.
On this week’s episode of Hotspots Live! host Shawn Palacious counts down the hottest cultural events, appearances and live performances in South Florida, including the Top 3 of the week. Also, catch the announcement of the Britney Spears Ticket Contest winner!
When I walked into Dudes Barber, it was unlike any other barbershop I had ever been in. What first got my attention was the Orange color and retro feel and then I focused in on the beautiful pool table.
I then met and sat down with Co-Owners and life partners Frank and Barry. F&B are coming up on their 20th anniversary and after talking with them for a few minutes it became obvious why. They clearly complement each other! As a matter of fact they basically spend all their time together, as they are both Flight Attendants for Jet Blue and only fly together.
I found out that some iconic Disco star will be at their opening, and asked Frank and Barry how they were able to get them all to be there, and I found out that Frank used to work for Disco 78, which was a TV show that came on right after Saturday Night Live. He had been out of that business for many years when he reconnected with Cynthia Manley (Ain’t No Mountain High Enough”) on facebook, and started helping her get gigs. She then recommended Frank to a few of her “Disco Era” friends and Frank had a new business….Disco-Stars.com.
What made you guys decide to open Dudes Barber?
Frank said: “A friend of ours is a barber and after Mojos closed he was looking for a place to work, and couldn’t find anything similar. After a short while chatting, we decided this would be a good business venture for us. Well, I had to convince Barry, but it didn’t take a lot for him to buy into this great idea. As a matter of fact, once we decided to open the business, it only took one month to open the doors.”
What made you open a barbershop?
Barry said: “Our intensions are to provide the community with a new concept in Barber Shops, and provide a place where people can come and relax, wind down, meet others and get a great haircut at a very reasonable price. It’s a home, it’s a hang out, and it’s a place where you can shoot a game of pool, enjoy a cold beverage, listen to music and chat with others. A place where we always try and make everyone feel welcome.”
What are some of the extras you get at Dudes Barber?
According to the manager JT, who has been in the business for 25 years, but only looks 35: “In addition to a fun atmosphere and incredibly attentive and friendly hair stylists, we offer a Pool Table, WiFi, a charging station and beverages that are all free.”
Whatkind of events we can expect at Dudes Barber?
Frank said: “We look forward to hosting special events from time to time with many of our friends in the music industry. We will start with our Grand Opening Celebration on Saturday, August 4th from 5pm-8pm. Our special friends, Joy and Rob from LIME, Susan, Siddy and Dalia from COMPANY B and MarLa also known as freestyle artist GIGGLES will be in the house performing for us all. The evening will also be hosted by Nikki Adams with music by VJ Barry Browder! We invite you to stop by the shop any time to meet our barbers, see the place, get a haircut or shave and make new friends”
Grand Opening is Saturday, August 4
Dudes Barbershop (2039 Wilton Drive) is open 7 days a week:
Sundays from 10 am to 6 pm
Mondays – Saturdays from 8 am to 7 pm.
For more information call them at 954-440-4191 or visit their website at: DudesBarber.com.
There’s a large faction of our selectively stuck-up society that think using a coupon on a first date is tacky. My guess is that they’re not the ones footing the bill; it’s easy to scoff at that “offensive” BOGO dinner deal when there’s no money leaving your own pocket.
I work hard for my money, and while I want to take my first dates out for a night of fun, adventure and flirty conversation, I also don’t want to go home to the poorhouse afterward. For that reason and eight more, here’s why it’s OK to use a coupon on the first date.
It’s a first date, and there’s no promise there will be a second one
When you’re playing the field, there’s only a 50/50 chance there will be a second date. Some would say those are pretty good odds in favor of the first date being a success, but you should never go all in on the initial hand. Because you don’t know how this date will go in advance, play it like you’ve got something to lose – your money. Plan a great date, but keep the cost reasonable enough that you can get back in the game in the very near future if this one’s a loss.
It goes over much better than having to ‘go Dutch’
It’s difficult to date when you’re on a tight budget – especially if you’re the one expected to pay (and if that is an expectation of your date, recognize it as a red flag) – but if a coupon makes the date possible, go for it. Ultimately it’s better than “going Dutch,” even more so if that’s not a plan you’ve discussed beforehand. Springing it on your date at the last minute is rude – and it’s a good way to get put on blast by that person on social media. My personal rule is that if I ask someone on a date, I plan to pay for it. If someone asks me on a date, I plan to pay my half; if they insist on paying the full bill, however, I’ll accept but not before I’ve offered to cover my share.
You’re being thrifty, not cheap – and there’s a difference
Discount-dating deniers like to call people who use coupons on the first date cheap. Pay them no mind. Using a coupon doesn’t make anybody cheap, ever, but it does prove that they’re financially conscious of cash flow – a great trait in a potential partner. If you’re not exactly sure where the line is drawn between cheap and frugal, look at it this way: Cheap is cutting corners to the detriment of yourself or others just so you don’t have to spend money whereas being frugal is being resourceful and savvy about how you spend it. This situation definitely falls under the latter category – so long as you’re not dining at McDonald’s or someplace else equally unworthy of your date’s effort to get out of bed for you.
Your affinity for frugality wards off potential gold diggers
Take this advice and hold on to it forever: If the person you’re taking out is notorious for attaching him- or herself to someone with deep pockets, they’ll get their hand out of yours when you pull out a coupon to pay for the date.
You can come up with a lot of fun date ideas by searching for coupons
If you’re not the best activity planner, that’s OK; not everyone is a creative-date genius, but looking for coupons can help in this regard. When I’m planning a date, I frequently visit Groupon or LivingSocial to see what’s going on in my area that might be fun and discounted. I’ve found fencing classes, piano bars, driving-range sessions, helicopter rides, escape rooms, and much more. As a result, my dates are often impressed at what I’ve come up with, and I’m happy that it was easy money.
Cutting the cost of date #1 makes a pricier date possible next time
It’s simple arithmetic: Spend less today so you have a little more to spend next time. In other words, treat the first date like a taste of what’s to come. By establishing midrange expectations from the beginning, anything else after will seem a step up – and it’ll be appreciated.
Being financially conservative turns some people on
Remember that episode of Friends where Monica schools Chandler on the seven basic erogenous zones? You know the one – “Seven… Seven… SEVEN!, SEVEN!, SEVEN!…” Well, for some people – like me, in fact – that enthusiasm is facilitated by talk of personal finance and saving money. Tell me how much you shaved off your car insurance bill by finding an overlooked discount and, well, let’s just say you don’t have to try much harder for the rest of the night. I’m not the only person out there who finds saving sexy either; there are plenty of folks for whom this is a turn-on.
Because you’re a ninja, your date never has to know you used a coupon
After all this, if you’re still worried about how your date might react to your coupon on the first date, nip it in the bud altogether. Visit, call or email the establishment(s) you plan to visit on your date in advance and let a server or manager know that you’ll be in later that night. Let them know that you’re a little self-conscious about using your coupon and you’d rather your date not know. Trust me, they’ll understand. When you get there, you’ll have absolutely no anxiety stressing you out aside from whether or not you’ll get a goodnight kiss – and if that’s the extent of your worries, you’re on the right track.
The MDGLCC presents “Digital Media Strategies for Brand Growth EXPOsure Networking Luncheon” from 11:30am – 1:30pm at Hialeah Park Casino & Racing (2200 East 4th Avenue, Hialeah). The luncheon will feature a presentation and panel discussion by esteem professionals in the fields of Marketing, Events, Entertainment, Print, Radio, & Entrepreneurship. Don’t miss out the opportunity to hear their advice and best practices to make the most of your Digital Media strategy and efforts. Registration, Networking & Expo are from 11:30am – 12pm; Panel Discussion & Lunch 12pm – 1:30pm; Networking & Expo open once again from 1:30pm – 2pm. Lunch is $35 for members and $45 for future members and there are 20 expo spaces available for chamber members, which is $75 including Lunch.
Starting today and going through Sunday (July 29), My Tropixxx presents their monthly “Ruby Member Sale,” where Ruby Members get 40% off. For more info call them at 954-522-5988.
Stonewall National Museum – Wilton Manors (2157 Wilton Drive) presents the film Paragraph 175 at 6 pm. Weimar, Germany was a homosexual Eden in the 1920s: gay and lesbian nightclubs and magazines flourished, the first homosexual rights movement was born…and then the Nazis came to power. Free to attend, with a $5 suggested donation. Refreshments provided courtesy of Barefoot Wine & Bubbly
Friday, July 27
The Museum of Contemporary Art North Miami (MOCA) is pleased to welcome Latin Grammy Award-winning artist Dr. Ed Calle for a special performance as part of its monthly “Jazz at MOCA” series at 8pm. Calle originates from Venezuela and is best known for playing the saxophone, however he is also a talented composer, orchestrator, producer, scholar, and professor at Miami Dade College. Admission is free, but for more info go to: .
Code Blue, the defending GSWS National Masters Champions, invites everyone to the Pub as they present a benefit for them to go back to the World Series to defend their national title. The theme is “Back to the 50’s” and starts at 8pm with a silent auction, a 50/50 raffle and VIP tables for sale.
The Seminole Theatre Players, a cast of local South Florida singers and dancers, will present the show Annie from today until Aug. 5. Annie features equal measures of pluck and positivity, as little orphan Annie charms everyone’s hearts despite a next-to-nothing start in 1930s New York City. She finds a new home and family in billionaire, Oliver Warbucks, his personal secretary, Grace Farrell, and a lovable mutt named Sandy. Performances run Fridays and Saturdays at 8pm, Saturday matinees at 2m, and Sunday matinees at 3pm. To purchase tickets or find out more information, visit or visit the box office (18 North Ave, Homestead, Fla.), open Tuesday through Saturday from noon to 6pm.
Saturday, July 28
ResQMe and Pet Supermarket present “Adoption Day,” for homeless dogs from 12-3pm at 1809 S University Drive, Davie. For more information call 305-970-5970 or go to: Resqmeahomelessdogmission.org.
Georgie’s Alibi/Monkey Bar present special guest DJ Shane Stiel in the main room from 9pm to 3am with no cover.
Adrienne Arsht Center presents WAR at 8pm. WAR is a world-renowned American funk band best known for the hit songs “Spill the Wine,” “Why Can’t We Be Friends?,” “Low Rider,” and many more! WAR’s lively mix of funk, rock, Latin, reggae, jazz and R&B and message of brotherhood and harmony made them one of the greatest bands of all time. The evolution of WAR began in 1969…and WAR has been evolving ever since. Tickets are $39, $49, $59, and $79, and for more info visit: .
The Manor World, with production by Alexey Roude and Jossean Rivera present “ZONE” starring DJ Anne Louise (resident DJ in Brazil) in the #Missionaryofhappiness international tour. The night will feature circuit production, live acts, star dancers and a custom stage design. In the Ivy Dance Room and Patio, Noche Latina Saturdays presents a tribute to Iris Chaconne starring Lana Novva Lanudde, Taina Norell, DJ Larry Larr and sexy Latin Go-Go papi’s. That night they will also be having the farewell party for Jomar King, right before he moves to Orlando. Saturdays at the Manor Complex features NO COVER before midnight.
Sunday, July 29
The Pub presents Lady Fancy’s Gospel Jubilee (after the huge success of last month’s premiere), which is a church of a different kind and features good old fashioned Southern Gospel music at 7 pm.
Monday, July 30
Georgie’s Alibi/Monkey Bar present “Nine Lives”, where Michael Walters celebrates 9 years of Dame Edna’s Broadway Cabaret from 8-10:30 in the Monkey Bar lounge.
Wednesday, August 1
Adrienne Arsht Center presents from today until August 19 at the Carnival Studio Theater. This one-woman tour-de-force performance brings more than 20 Latina women to glorious life on stage by weaving together tales of love, marriage, immigration, and identity through eclectic stories and whimsical song! Tickets are $50, and $55, and for more info go to: Arshtcenter.org.
This is HOT
Stick It! champions the versatility of the humble sticky note with forty projects divided into three categories: Wall Art, Origami, and Decorations. Ideas range from a colorful lampshade to a functional wall calendar; from origami flowers and boxes to a graphic table runner.
Jazz up your cubicle, dorm room, or office by embellishing a wall with: a massive 200+ sticky note octopus, a soothing scene of geometric tiles, a Halloween/Day of the Dead skull, a ruffled peacock, or a threatening rain cloud.
There is a project to suit everyone, and patterns to utilize throughout the year (Valentine’s Day and birthday cards, daisy chains and Christmas holly to name a few . . . ). With easy instructions and step-by-step illustrations, anyone can indulge their creativity, no matter your ability.
Author, Bridget Dove is a creative crafter. She does a wide range of work for books, magazines, and newspapers, from propping sets to writing and illustrating. Stick It! is $12.99 and available atgibbs-smith.com.
Adhering to a schedule of healthy eating, keeping up with regular medical check-ups, and getting enough sleep requires a lot of work. Sticking to these basic habits along with meeting the demands of work and a social life can be overwhelming. So why do you bother squeezing exercise into an already hectic lifestyle?
Always make time for things that are important to you, and nothing is more important than good health. Working out with weights and doing regular cardio are draining and time consuming. Yet their benefits are infinite. You’ll not only look better, you’ll live longer and save hundreds of thousands of dollars in health care expenses. Doubt me? Just get sick, I mean really sick, like a week in the hospital and you’ll see what I mean. Don’t know where to start? Begin with simple activities you like: walking, swimming, or biking. Eventually exercise will become a part of your daily routine if you can learn to enjoy yourself!
Stop making excuses and procrastinating. Besides work and loved ones, exercise and good nutrition should be goals for everyone. Yet pampered expensive cruises and vacations and wild weekend partying often take precedence as waistlines widen, butts get bigger and life is cut shorter by bad and unhealthy decisions. Sure, there are short cuts available like plastic surgery and steroids, but these are quick patchy fixes compared to what discipline and hard work can achieve. A beautiful, natural body at every age obtained through sacrifice, dedication and lots of sweat is a wonderful thing to behold and possess!
Why not start today and design a winning strategy to get and stay fit. Consider three factors as you ponder a program: schedule flexibility, workout simplification, and diversification.
Schedule flexibility is crucial in these times of unplanned events, hectic traffic and chaotic work schedules. A sharp guy begins the day with a plan so that he can accomplish everything that is important. Nothing is more crucial than your workout, so schedule a time and try to stick with it. Join a gym that is conveniently located between work and home. Most gyms have extended hours, so if you get derailed don’t despair. Your body responds to exercise whether it’s 7AM or 7 PM.
Simplify and diversify your exercise routine. If you were set to hit the weight room at 6 PM, but had to work late, then pump-up at home. A few dumbbells are inexpensive, but they can make a difference on days you don’t get to the gym. Do some push-ups, crunches and stretches during breaks at work. Bike around your neighborhood on weekends. Take a swim in the ocean or that pool you pay someone to maintain. Do something, anything, just put those muscles into motion! Of all the investments you’ll make in life, a commitment to regular exercise will reap the greatest benefits.
The other day I heard a self-proclaimed democrat who voted for Trump say he didn’t like Hillary.
“Bernie would have won. We told them we wanted Bernie,” he said, referring to Sanders winning the primary election in Michigan. “But they didn’t listen to us.”
He didn’t exactly admit that voting for Trump was a mistake, but he did acknowledge that Trump was not a good president. He was also (spoiler alert!) a straight white guy.
While listening to this man talk I thought I was going to grind my teeth into powder.
This was just a few hours before Trump was to announce his U.S. Supreme Court pick. Something I felt literally sick over.
You see, the Supreme Court is pretty important to me. In June, 2015, I was sitting in a chemo ward getting poisoned pumped into my body as part of my treatment for breast cancer. I was more miserable than I’d ever been, and not just because I was bald, bloated and nauseous.
The clock was ticking. Not on my life so much, as treatment — though hellacious — was going well and I had a good prognosis. But my insurance was running out. Aug. 31 would be my last day with insurance and I was only half way done with treatment. I was terrified that saving my life would bankrupt my family.
Before the Supreme Court in June 2015 were two cases over issues that would decide my fate: marriage equality and the Affordable Care Act.
See, I was legally married to my wife. We had a legal document from California as proof. But that wasn’t recognized in Michigan. And so my wife’s health insurance, far better than mine, was out of reach. So I’d planned to buy insurance through the Affordable Care Act.
Yet the court’s ruling could’ve effectively dismantled the ACA. And the court’s ruling on marriage equality could’ve effectively rendered me permanently without a legal spouse.
So when the Supreme Court ruled that the ACA was safe (for that time being), I was relieved. And when they ruled that yes, my marriage was real and Michigan damn well better recognize it, I was, well, I was very sick, so it was hard to feel especially celebratory, but I did feel like a huge weight had been lifted off of me and my family.
The next day my wife called her HR person to add me to her insurance. I was expecting a fight. They just said, “Okay, can you spell her name?” We then went to our lawyer to have papers drawn up to make me, finally, the legal parent to my son. It was literally life-changing.
So to all of the people who voted for Trump because they “just didn’t like Clinton,” I cannot forgive you. You put America’s most vulnerable populations in peril because you didn’t like a lady’s laugh.
You didn’t have to vote for Clinton. You could’ve voted for the Supreme Court. You could’ve voted against the candidate endorsed by Nazis. You could have voted against the candidate that bragged about sexually assaulting women. You could have even voted for no one!
The problem is, of course, that Mr. “Bernie would’ve won” didn’t have a lot at stake when casting his vote. Being white, male and heterosexual is pretty much a superpower in America. Very little hurts you. This superpower is even stronger in men with money.
Under Trump, every day’s a new nightmare for minorities and women (and, yes, I know that white women also went for Trump; whiteness is a hell of a drug). His administration has attacked (and this is a partial list) transgender people, the sick, immigrants, asylum seekers, black people, Mexicans, women, the disabled, the press, lesbians and gays and anyone who doesn’t look like Stephen Miller.
If you voted for this and you’re happy about what’s happening, well, congratulations. Enjoy it, I guess. I hope it filled the void in you where empathy is supposed to be.
And if you voted for this and you’re not happy about it? You have a lot of work to do! But it will first take the ability to look at yourself in the mirror and say, “I did a selfish and shortsighted thing and I am personally responsible for hurting lots of people.” Which isn’t an easy task. It’ll suck, but not as badly as having your civil rights stripped from you sucks.
As they say, actions speak louder than words. Volunteer for a democrat’s campaign (because under Trump Republicans have proven to all be trash). Donate money to progressive causes that help people being hurt by Trump’s policies.
Don’t you dare ask me or anyone else who wakes up every day terrified by the erosion of our rights and our democracy for forgiveness. The road to redemption is long. And no, we will not give you a ride. You walk and think about what you did.
Really, aside from a fame-catapulting role on Empire and a dreamy croon so velvety you could rest your head on it at night, Jussie Smollett is just like you. Or was: He remembers going to Pride. All the rainbows and free love and free condoms and fiery ex-boyfriend drama.
These days, he has shown up (to Long Beach Pride and Milwaukee Pride) as Singer Smollett, with swoon-worthy songs from his recently released debut — a contemporary R&B collection called Sum of My Music that’s as thoughtful as it is hooky — after putting it on the shelf for years because he was too busy diversifying TV.
As out musician Jamal Lyon on the Fox drama Empire, Smollett, who got his start acting with 1992’s The Mighty Ducks, has crashed TV’s straight cis white party by bringing a positive depiction of a gay black man to your living room since the series premiered in 2015. Additionally, the 35-year-old multifaceted talent was featured as a celebrity correspondent during a May episode of the EPIX docu-series America Divided, exploring the horrific history of American racism.
Activist, singer, game-changing actor. A no-fucks businessman. Mariah Carey’s music-publishing student. And… a cookbook scribe? As Smollett’s groundbreakingly boundless career proves, when you’ve faced Pride drama, no one — not ex-boyfriends, not Sony execs — can stand in your way.
How have your life experiences shaped this album?
Sum of My Music is the totality, pretty much, of what I’ve been dealing with over the last couple of years. The things with love, the things with my own personal insecurities, and the insecurities others put on you. And I write about my jealousy! [Laughs.]
You gotta work it out.
I gotta work it out. I talk about a lot of personal things. I’ve been singing [Empire] soundtracks for a couple of years now, and… I’ve written, like, half of the songs that I sing on the show, but it’s nice to be able to hide behind my own stories and my own lyrics that are just for me.
You’ve been in showbiz since you were a kid. What challenges have you faced as a gay black man in Hollywood?
Umm… [long pause]. You know, I’d like to…. Let me think about it. I’ve been so focused on creating my own projects, honest to god. That’s really the message that I’m trying to get out there as much as possible: to create your own pieces, your own projects. I’m not interested anymore in convincing anybody that I’m valid enough or my stories are valid enough to tell.
But, of course there are challenges to being openly black [Laughs.] and openly gay. At the same time, what else am I supposed to do? This is who I am. Am I supposed to, in 2018, not live my life now for a role? I have to just keep it moving, and I have to create with people. This is why I’m an executive producer on Giants, which is on [Insecure producer and actress] Issa Rae’s YouTube channel. It deals with everything from mental illness to homosexuality, and everything in between.
Mariah Carey, who you duetted with on Empire and opened for on tour, famously fought for creative control in the’90s. I know you initially planned on releasing this album on Columbia Records, but it ended up on your own indie label, Music of Sound. What did you learn from Mariah about creative freedom?
I remember being on the phone with her for three hours and [Mariah] just breaking down publishing for me. When I asked to be let out of my contract with Columbia, I was armed with knowledge from people like her and different artists I’ve met, veterans in the business who really held my hand without even knowing it. Like, they thought they were just telling me something smart, but little did they know — or maybe they did know — they were really arming me with what I needed. That’s why you should always be unselfish with your knowledge, ’cause you never know if it’s gonna help somebody in the future.
From what I’ve heard you cry when you perform “Freedom,” off the new album.
I can’t help it.
What is it about that song that gets you emotional?
There’s one particular part where I’m like, [sings] “and I don’t care what they say, ’cause I know who we are to each other.” I cry every single time. And maybe it’s because I have to push really hard for that note! [Laughs.] Or, maybe it’s just that it reminds me of how precious love is. And it reminds me of that idea of, I just — I want to love.
To me, freedom is the ability to love — not just accept. I hate that word, “accept.” It’s not even about that. It’s about changing our molecular structure so we recognize love… and love. How can love possibly be bad?
You’ve been representing a sorely underrepresented group of people on Empire — the gay black male community. What has that meant to you?
It really humbles me. And it makes me grateful. I remember that there was nobody on TV who I could identify with. The very first person I ever saw who was gay at all that I could somewhat identify with was Wilson Cruz [as Rickie Vasquez] on [mid ’90s teen drama] My So-Called Life.
He was someone of color, and I grew up loving people like Elton John, but I couldn’t identify with Elton John. I didn’t put two and two together — it wasn’t representation. I loved George Michael growing up. I loved Boy George growing up. But I didn’t connect. And maybe I would’ve been able to connect more had I seen more people at that level who represented me. So, nothing against them. They’re wonderful.
Elton subverted the label. Elton was just Elton.
Exactly. I hope we can all get to that point. But representation is so important and the responsibility…. I don’t know if good people are supposed to say they’re good, but I am saying I’m a good person. I take responsibility for all that I am.
I’ve been given a platform, and I’ve worked for that platform. I’ve been doing this since I was 4. Got my SAG card in 1987. You have people looking up to you, you have people who somehow feel affected by what you do. There is a certain level of responsibility that you must take. There is no debate, I don’t give a fuck. If the people are listening to you, you should say something worth hearing.
Politically?
Literally regarding anything that is unjust. It is your responsibility to speak up.
Can you tell me about your first Pride event?
Oh, god. I had the best time, and then got in a major fight with my boyfriend. See, this is the thing: If your shit is strong, Pride can be a real good time. If your shit is weak, Pride will tear a motherfucker apart!
Oh yeah, it can be drama, depending on who you see.
It can be major drama, especially if it’s the city in which you live.
Because you’re gonna run into ex-boyfriends.
You gonna run into exes, you gonna run into their exes. I was dating someone, and every single Pride we had an issue. Nowadays, I’m very calm. [Laughs.]
You have a cookbook coming out, a collaboration with your siblings; that’s how settled down you are.
I have a fucking cookbook with my family — I’m very settled down. I’m in a calm, wonderful relationship. My life is just calmer, it’s more secure. So now, when I go to pride, it’s all love.
Long Beach Pride was the first Pride I’ve ever performed at. Ever since Empire started, I always said, “No, I don’t want to do Pride until I do it for my album. I want it to be special.” And that’s what we ended up doing. And it’s been fun.
Because I need a husband: What do you cook for your man and are those recipes in the book?
Listen, everybody needs to know how to cook. You got to get your man right.
What’s the right man dish?
I do a good stir-fry. I can’t give away my secrets of what I throw down, and how I throw down, and what I throw down with, in the kitchen. But it definitely goes down in the kitchen — in more ways than one.
What’s your Pride message for the LGBTQ community?
To love yourself. Love yourself and love each other. We are literally all we got. It’s that simple.
Listen, I know it’s deeper than just that. We have to deal with policy changes, we gotta deal with law changes. We gotta deal with all of that. It’s economic. It’s all of these things. But everything starts with love. And I hate the term “minority,” but if every single so-called minority group were to raise up and join together, we would be a fierce majority that no motherf*cker could take down.
Watch as host Shawn Palacious counts down the hottest cultural events, appearances and live performances in South Florida, including the Top 3 of the week.
IT Chapter TwoFeatures Xavier Dolan and Also That Murder-Clown
Do you arthouse? If so, then you already know that Xavier Dolan, the wunderkind director-actor from Montreal, is responsible for an ever-growing body of queer-themed films that regularly induce swooning on the international film-festival circuit — and good fests, too, like Cannes.
But if you don’t, then you at least know him from watching Adele’s “Hello” video, which he directed.
Soon enough, though, you’ll be seeing him play a gay character in the next installment of IT. The hugely successful big screen adaptation of Stephen King’s horror novel will fast forward for IT Chapter Two, picking up the story of the now-adult kids and the horrors they confront. The grown-up versions will be played by Jessica Chastain, James McAvoy, Bill Hader, and Isaiah Mustafa (yep, the Old Spice Guy). Dolan will play a townsperson attacked for his sexuality.
Meanwhile, will return as sewer-dwelling death-reaper Pennywise. No word on whether they’re going to write in The Babadook as Pennywise’s love interest, but we can all dream.
The RayWillFinally BeGayon Blu-ray
Remember when we told you that the first queer animated DC superhero movie was on its way? Well, it’s almost here. Freedom Fighters: The Ray, from the creative team behind live-action shows like Arrow, Supergirl, and The Flash, is the first time a gay superhero has been the lead character in a DC Comics project.
The story follows Ray Terrill (Russell Tovey), a young man who discovers a dying superhero from another Earth, one who looks just like him. The dying doppelganger transfers photokinetic energy to the new Ray, turning him into a superhero, too: just a gay one who still has to come out to his parents.
We think this is very good idea because we already know plenty of queer people who deserve superhero status. It’s long past time that we at least had a cartoon version, and this one is going to fight Nazis, so it couldn’t be more appropriate for this moment in American history. It all arrives to DVD/Blu-ray and streaming platforms at the end of August.
I hear the same complaint all the time: “I never have enough money.”
Truth is, we’ve all been there, but while some of us choose to confront the situation head on to get out of that rut, others continue the paycheck-to-paycheck lifestyle for a number of reasons. What are they? Find out where you fit in here.
1. You’re Not Budgeting Properly.
The sole purpose of budgeting is so you can keep track of exactly how much money is coming into, and going out of, your bank account every month. For this system to work, you must track your finances accurately. Otherwise, it becomes a messy situation. For instance, your take-home pay generally stays the same, but that’s not always the case for your expenses (i.e., your bills) — your electricity bill especially fluctuates month to month, as does your phone bill, probably.
It’s important to follow those variable expenses to the cent so you can decide where to make changes, such as cutting back on recreational activities, picking up a part-time job, or other adjustments to ensure that you have enough money (and a little excess) in your budget every month.
2. You’re Shopping Frivolously.
It’s easy to go overboard when shopping, especially if you’re susceptible to impulse buying, so it’s important to keep your wallet in check when you go out. If you know you can’t afford anything extra this month, don’t tempt yourself by going shopping (or “browsing”). Find something more productive to do with your time — like thinking of ways to make extra money (imagine that!) — so you don’t fall prey to spending money you don’t have.
3. You’re Neglecting Your Savings Account.
I treat my savings account as a reserve that should only be touched in extreme emergencies. I funnel money to that account consistently, after all my monthly expenses have first been paid. I do include a bit of extra money in my budget to do things I like, like go to the movies or hang out with friends on the weekends. But after bills and regular expenses are paid, most of my leftover earnings go to savings.
If you’re in such a financial bind that you have neither funds in your checking account nor your savings, you need to reevaluate your priorities before you’re faced with a major expense that could put you deeply in debt for years to come.
4. You’re Being Lazy.
This may sound harsh, but I believe laziness is one of the most common problems among people who complain they don’t have enough money. Now, before you start sending nastygrams my way, I’m not talking about the hard-working Americans in unfortunate circumstances who can barely make ends meet; those folks know how real the struggle is, and they’re constantly working to correct the situation in most cases.
Instead, I’m referring to perfectly middle and lower-middle class folks who have just enough money to cover their expenses and more time than they know what to do with, which, coincidentally, is anything but work harder.
I have no sympathy and very little tolerance for these people. Personally, I try to make an extra buck everywhere I can, so I can enjoy the life I have. That means having lots of little side gigs: taking on additional writing work, renting out my homes on Airbnb, dog sitting via Rover.com, and shopping and delivering groceries using Instacart. These are things that almost anyone can do. To be in the red financially because you’re being lazy is no one’s fault but your own and — dare I say it? — probably well deserved.
5. You Have Too Many Costly Commitments in Your Life.
If you have a lot of friends and family, you’re probably inundated with invitations to weddings, birthday parties, baby showers, and more — and these events can be costly. There are times, of course, when you can’t get out of it (like when your sister is getting married), but if you’re tight on cash already and it’s not essential that you attend the party, you’re allowed to politely decline. There’s no shame in citing financial hardship either; most reasonable and caring people will totally understand your plight.
6. You’re Not Cutting Costs Where You Can.
Are there expenses in your life that are nonessential? Perhaps you can downgrade your mobile plan, cancel the gym membership you’re not using, or cut the cable in favor of cheaper streaming services if you don’t watch all that much TV. I bet there’s at least one way, or maybe even a couple, you can shave some money off your monthly expenses if you take a good look at what you’re paying for and start making a few phone calls.
7. You’re Making Poor Decisions on the Weekends.
Just like shopping frivolously, eating out and buying drinks on the weekends — you might even tell yourself it’s to take your mind off your money problems — is the exact opposite of what you should be doing. If you can’t afford a full fridge of healthy food, you can’t afford wings, beer, and shots either.
This habit is wrong on a few levels. And if this is your routine, it’s absolutely the reason you can’t get to the other side of broke — and why you’re likely not very happy with yourself as a result. Rein in this nasty habit and take stock of what really matters to you. If hitting the bar is more important than paying your bills, you’ve got a serious problem on your hands, and you may need professional help.
8. You’re Living Beyond Your Means.
You make $60,000 a year, but you’re spending $80,000; even someone without a background in personal finance can tell you those numbers don’t add up. Yet many of us consciously go into debt to keep up appearances or to treat ourselves to things we think we deserve — even when we don’t have the money to cover it.
The obvious solution here is to downsize, but I know that’s not always easy; it’s a blow to the ego, and you may be afraid of how you’ll be perceived by those around you. But let me offer a slice of advice — who gives a flying f*ck? Are these people paying your mortgage or your kids’ college tuition? No. And you shouldn’t feel a certain way about what somebody else thinks about your financial situation unless they’re sending you a check every month.
Worry about yourself and your financial health instead of what the people who probably aren’t your friends anyway think. You’ll get along much easier in life that way.
9. You’ve Accumulated Too Much Debt.
Hey, it happens — and it’s not always under your control. Perhaps you have school loans, or maybe you bought your dream home and lost your job. That’s life, and it’s nothing to be ashamed about. But your debt should not be ignored. It won’t go away — unless you declare bankruptcy, of course, but you don’t want to do that.
Instead, enact some of the previous tips, like downsizing, cutting losses, budgeting better, and creating a long-term plan to chip away at the debt you owe to creditors. The process won’t be quick or easy, but people have overcome far worse. You will survive.
What kind of events we can expect at Dudes Barber?
Stick It! champions the versatility of the humble sticky note with forty projects divided into three categories: Wall Art, Origami, and Decorations. Ideas range from a colorful lampshade to a functional wall calendar; from origami flowers and boxes to a graphic table runner.